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Post by TheGremlin on Jul 5, 2010 1:37:25 GMT
Come, and join the terrible wonderful priesthood of the great Boxbot! First, I would like to dispel a few rumours. Fiction: Boxbot is terrible. Fact: Boxbot is in fact wonderful, unlike the blasphemous Robox! My evidence for this: This signed paper from Tom!What? No signature, you say? Well, um, Tom, *ahem* can't write. So of course he ddin't sign his name. NEXT QUESTION! Fiction: Boxbot can only say 'Helloooo' and 'Awwww'. Fact: Boxbot speaks to us, but only us, his faithful servants. Wait! He speaks now! He says...he has gone temporarily mute. Not to worry! He'll be able to talk tomorrow, I'm sure! And his priesthood wouldn't lie! Fiction: Boxbot is terrible. Fact: Clearly you remain unconvinced. Didn't you see that we already busted this myth? NEXT QUESTION! Fiction: Boxbot's clergy are insane. Fact: I'll let my puppet, Mr. Beaker, answer this one. What? What's that, Beaker? Ah! Well, same to you! Stupid puppet. Fiction: Boxbot is terrible. Fact: He's just misunderstood! Fac--Fiction: Boxbot is terrible. Fact: Look, he's not terrible! Um...LOOK! SOMETHING SHINY! Skip to the next question, Beaker!Fiction: Boxbot is terrible. Fact: Looks like it's time for an exorcism, Beaker! Anyways, come and join the Temple of Boxbot, and help us prove that Boxbot is not at all terrible! Now, our first bit of business: Why and how is the holy water on fire? Is this another one of Lord Boxbot's miracles? |
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Post by legion on Jul 5, 2010 1:48:51 GMT
You're crazy. Stop being so crazy.
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Post by TheGremlin on Jul 5, 2010 2:19:07 GMT
Heresy! Fortunately for you, we are understanding. Mr. Beaker would have me slowly torture you to death. I, however, have a humane proposal: You renounce what you have said, join the clergy, and punch Elvis in the face.  |
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Post by Ignotus Somnium on Jul 5, 2010 3:17:03 GMT
You speak blasphemy. Clearly Robox is the superior deity. Boxbot is trying to lead you from his path of awesome into the pit of terribleness.
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Post by TheGremlin on Jul 5, 2010 3:26:37 GMT
You are mad. MAD! MAD! MAD! MAD! MAD! Isn't he mad, Beaker? Yes, he is! MAD! MAD! MAD! Wait, what? Stupid puppet! He's mad, mad MAD MAD MAD!
Etc.
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preus
Full Member
Posts: 246
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Post by preus on Jul 5, 2010 3:34:34 GMT
Behold! Here is your false prophet! He sings the praises of Boxbot the Terrible! Lord of All That Is Stupid and Pointless! Burn him, says I! Or at least singe him a little bit! SINGE HIM!
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Post by TheGremlin on Jul 5, 2010 5:09:17 GMT
HERETICS! Only Lord Boxbot can save your souls now! Renounce your fool Robox and perhaps Boxbot will have mercy on your sad souls!
*Burns Robox in effigy*
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preus
Full Member
Posts: 246
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Post by preus on Jul 5, 2010 5:27:41 GMT
What is that, a cardboard box you painted silver with tube legs? It's a pretty good likeness actually. You used stereo speakers for eyes, right? That's quite clever. Well done.
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Post by edzepp on Jul 5, 2010 7:11:10 GMT
I am from the Church of the Divine Mechanical Bovine.
YOU WILL ACCEPT LASER COW AS YOUR LORD AND SAVIOR
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Post by TheGremlin on Jul 5, 2010 16:47:32 GMT
I am from the Church of the Divine Mechanical Bovine. YOU WILL ACCEPT LASER COW AS YOUR LORD AND SAVIOR Fools! Your pathetic cows will never reach the status of a true Gunnerkrig Court religion! Because you don't have burnt effigies. We do. Sucks to be you. (What's that, Beaker? The fire from the effigy spread to the entire church? Well, just don't let anybody find out!) |
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Post by dawngazer on Jul 5, 2010 17:29:41 GMT
I am from the Church of the Divine Mechanical Bovine. YOU WILL ACCEPT LASER COW AS YOUR LORD AND SAVIOR Fools! Your pathetic cows will never reach the status of a true Gunnerkrig Court religion! Because you don't have burnt effigies. We do. Sucks to be you. (What's that, Beaker? The fire from the effigy spread to the entire church? Well, just don't let anybody find out!)The Fire Marshal almost had a epilepsy. He kindly asked to speak on his behalf and tell you to politely desist or get hosed. And by hosed, I mean shot. With bullets. And shurikens. And lighting. He is one hell of a Fire Marshal. |
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Post by TheGremlin on Jul 5, 2010 17:46:52 GMT
Fools! Your pathetic cows will never reach the status of a true Gunnerkrig Court religion! Because you don't have burnt effigies. We do. Sucks to be you. (What's that, Beaker? The fire from the effigy spread to the entire church? Well, just don't let anybody find out!)The Fire Marshal almost had a epilepsy. He kindly asked to speak on his behalf and tell you to politely desist or get hosed. And by hosed, I mean shot. With bullets. And shurikens. And lighting. He is one hell of a Fire Marshal. Lord Boxbot will STRIKE THE MARSHAL DOWN! HERETICS! |
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preus
Full Member
Posts: 246
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Post by preus on Jul 6, 2010 3:13:17 GMT
Out fire martial is so badass.
We should bake him a cake. MADE OF BULLETS AND NAILS.
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Post by TheGremlin on Jul 6, 2010 4:12:41 GMT
HERESY!
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preus
Full Member
Posts: 246
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Post by preus on Jul 6, 2010 7:56:03 GMT
Little known fact: The word heresy comes from the Greek haireisthai, meaning to choose of one's own free will.
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whosit
Full Member
So totally a self-portrait.
Posts: 105
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Post by whosit on Jul 6, 2010 8:20:47 GMT
Holy frikkin' barfmonkeys... why couldn't the Beast take a less abominable form? Like, a jaguar made of Geraldo's mustache clippings and razor-wire? No, no... it just HAD to be Boxbot.
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Post by legion on Jul 6, 2010 8:25:03 GMT
"to choose of one's own free will" is one heck of a pleonasm. My dic says it comes "hairesis" which just means "choice, taking", leading to Latin "haeresis", originally meaning "doctrine, system", then "doctrine opposed to the Church's dogma" in Church Latin.
Dictionary tip: the etymology of a word is not its meaning.
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whosit
Full Member
So totally a self-portrait.
Posts: 105
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Post by whosit on Jul 6, 2010 8:34:38 GMT
I say we end this abomination, before Boxbot claims any more souls. How does one kill such a demon as Boxbot, you ask??? With SCIENCE!!! (Cue theme music) |
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preus
Full Member
Posts: 246
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Post by preus on Jul 6, 2010 9:16:10 GMT
"to choose of one's own free will" is one heck of a pleonasm. My dic says it comes "hairesis" which just means "choice, taking", leading to Latin "haeresis", originally meaning "doctrine, system", then "doctrine opposed to the Church's dogma" in Church Latin. Dictionary tip: the etymology of a word is not its meaning. You're right. 'Choose' would have been more than sufficient. My dictionary says different. Whatever. I never claimed etymology equated with meaning. You can't say I did. Or rather, you can, but that would be a big stinky fib. |
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whosit
Full Member
So totally a self-portrait.
Posts: 105
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Post by whosit on Jul 6, 2010 15:09:15 GMT
Now, our first bit of business: Why and how is the holy water on fire? Is this another one of Lord Boxbot's miracles? Since this is Boxbot's religion we're talking about, the 'holy water' is clearly absinthe. If it's on fire, it's not a miracle--it's just your fault.  |
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Post by TheGremlin on Jul 6, 2010 16:47:18 GMT
Begin the sacrifices, so that we may be successful in our battle!
*A single pig sitting on the ground*
*Few minutes later...*
Begin the sacrifices, so that we may be successful in our sacrifice! *Stabs orange*
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Post by the bandit on Jul 6, 2010 20:01:09 GMT
This thread is terrible and you should feel terrible.
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Post by TheGremlin on Jul 6, 2010 20:49:28 GMT
*Throws orange at HERETIC*
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whosit
Full Member
So totally a self-portrait.
Posts: 105
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Post by whosit on Jul 6, 2010 21:11:26 GMT
Grem, is that an ethereal boxbot I see on your head? Hold still....
(To Bandit) Well, at least you only got an orange thrown at your head. They tried to throw me into the Boxbot pit. Uncalled for, really... you'd think I'd challenged their beliefs and plotted to destroy their idol, or something. ;D
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Post by TheGremlin on Jul 7, 2010 0:11:30 GMT
Grem, is that an ethereal boxbot I see on your head? Hold still.... (To Bandit) Well, at least you only got an orange thrown at your head. They tried to throw me into the Boxbot pit. Uncalled for, really... you'd think I'd challenged their beliefs and plotted to destroy their idol, or something. ;D TOUCH NOT THE HOLY INCARNATION OF OUR LORD! HERETIC! *Throws moldy banana at Whosit* |
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Post by dawngazer on Jul 7, 2010 0:21:48 GMT
... YOU. ARE. A. TOOOOOOOYIIIE!You aren't the real disciple of Boxbot!You're a!- Dargh your an action figure!You are a Boxbot's plaything! With that said, I'm the real disciple of Boxbot who was in hiding! I reveal myself now. Mind the fireworks and marching band that materialize with that announcement- a miracles by our great Boxbot! |
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Post by Dvandaemon on Jul 7, 2010 1:33:50 GMT
My people believe that Boxbot and Robox will join together in a matrimony that will end the universe with terribleness and rebirth it with awesome
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Post by TheGremlin on Jul 8, 2010 16:06:43 GMT
My people believe that Boxbot and Robox will join together in a matrimony that will end the universe with terribleness and rebirth it with awesome ... This is worse than heresy. This is...TERRIBLE. KILL THE ABOMINATION! *Fires comically outdated blunderbuss which fails to work* |
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Post by theweatherman on Sept 8, 2010 19:41:25 GMT
pfft, you mere mortals praise an unworthy god, the only true god is...
Kat! She of awesome! She who punches topless owl-men! She who builds robots of cool! She who has haircuts that rock your socks! She with the weird thing for birds...!
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Shenko
New Member
Umbrae Sumus
Posts: 27
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Post by Shenko on Sept 9, 2010 0:33:36 GMT
pfft, you mere mortals praise an unworthy god, the only true god is... Kat! She of awesome! She who punches topless owl-men! She who builds robots of cool! She who has haircuts that rock your socks! She with the weird thing for birds...! Not to mention she could destroy and rebuild both Robox and Boxbot a million times over. |
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